Of far greater value than the sponsor’s generous Kit Kat to the winners, was the satisfaction of being voted top alongside the charismatic Richard Hyde, whose gangsta rap was a joy to behold. I cannot begin to imagine where he got the idea of a rhyming PK from; still he carried it off with great panache and he was a worthy adversary as was our felllow protagonist, John Curran. Here is my own humble offering, which has evolved from an earlier post but with some new additions:
1. We tend to bend to fad and trend in how we learn and train,
Some theories are discredited, but others still remain.
Like flavours of the month each one appears, then fades away;
But some things should be constant, and that’s why I’m here today.
2. My class at school had 60 kids, yet standards still were high,
Curriculum was rich and full and made you want to try.
They taught us how to cross‐stitch and they taught us how to sing,
And how to model animals from paper, card and string.
3. And it wasn’t even boring if you had a clause to parse,
Back in the 1950s – when they taught you “The 3 Rs”!
We worked out long division sums without a calculator,
And so built many useful skills for life that we’d use later.
4. The mantra of the day was “Learner‐Centred Education”,
And though we sat in formal rows, we learned through exploration.
Our days were filled with fun and joy, activity and laughter,
Experiment, hypothesis, reflection followed after.
5. Bandura was a young man, yet to publish his great tract
On social learning theory, but in this I nothing lacked.
First chick I kissed was Gillian aged 8, and none was cuter;
We both developed social skills without phone or computer.
6. Though poor, we saw our cup as not half empty, but half full,
Imagination filled the day, ambition was the pull.
On team game sport our every thought was focused at Assembly;
We’d dream and thrill, imagine skill at Wimbledon or Wembley.
7. Science, Language, Music, Maths and Poetry ‐ all that in
Each busy day, yet still a way was found to fit in Latin.
Each minute planned, inaction banned, no time for idle yearning;
The best way to describe it is sit‐up, not sit‐back learning.
8. We didn’t need a garage, for we had no phone or car in
Those distant days of black and white and wireless and Gagarin
We didn’t have our own TV – a neighbour’s set was handy
Watched Champion the Wonder Horse, Lone Ranger, Andy Pandy.
9. We studied in the corridor, the playground and the field,
And thus the miracles of life and nature were revealed.
And when I say we “walked the walk“, I simply mean we found
The whole world was our classroom, and a world of light and sound.
10. How does this piece of history inform the present age?
What lesson can we take from it, with e‐things all the rage?
I think the answer’s very plain and clear for all to see,
It’s possible to feel the joy of learning without “e”.
11. It may be true, nostalgia now ain’t what it used to be;
Technology did not begin in 1963.
But, if you do “go digital” and take the online road,
Inform, inspire, set minds on fire, but just don’t overload.
12. When a client asks for training, try not always to say “yes”
Before you’ve given pause to think, “What’s got them in this mess?
Is the problem real, or is it just somebody’s whim?”
Beware – this means you sometimes have to go out on a limb.
13. Be wary of E‐vangelists, they are the breed to fear
Though they may not see the problem, their solution’s always clear
A training course is called upon, as if it were a saviour
And not a means of getting to observable behaviour.
14. It’s always best to ask yourself, “What am I trying to do?”
Start at the end performance then track back works well, it’s true.
And if you cannot see the wood and only see the tree ‐ it
Is helpful if you ask “How will I know it when I see it?”
15. Help them see that Training’s not a universal cure,
Or very soon your customers will show you to the door.
No never hit on Training as a given, or I fear
You will lose credibility with each new panacea.
16. Cost‐effective means much more than just, “do training faster”,
You would not ever try to cure a tumour with a plaster*
A training course is costly both in terms of time and money
And if you squander either it will not be seen as funny.
17. A simple fix might do far more than training can, you know,
Review results and challenge with, “What does the data show?”
Right at the start determine what you will evaluate
Leave it to the end, and you will find it’s far to late.
18. For companies must measure most what matters most of all,
So take the message far and wide when cynics come to call
That it isn’t witty wording or smart graphics that succeed,
But the focus on performance, and the outcomes that you need.
19. And so I’ll rest, I’ve done my best, to make the message snappy.
I hope my pearls of wisdom made you smile and left you happy.
I started with one acid test but now they number two
Memorise them both, and they will tell you what to do.
20. The red list on the left hand side is all about the game
“Performance‐Engineering” ‐ order‐taking’s not the aim
The blue list on the right hand side will use a different measure
So learning never is a chore, but always is a pleasure.
